Weekend Sack-Up: Bandwagoning

So, this weekend was pretty ridiculous. CSU was good, Denver was horrible again and Halloween was too much fun/pain. Alas, I survived with minor damage to my liver and major damage to my already crippled wallet (both metaphorically and in reality).

We will start with the good, CSU: We beat up on another bad team, and it is refreshing to find out that there are 2 teams much worse than us. If we can run the ball, we are a good team. If we can't, and we become one-dimensional, we are really bad. It doesn't hurt that our schedule has featured two of the top 6 teams in the nation.

It was great to see Leonard Mason let out the beast, hopefully he comes on like Triplesticks (Gartrell Johnson) did during the CSU stretch runs in 2008. We still have a shot at bowl elgibility, but the biggest test will come this weekend in San Diego (hey, I live there) as CSU attempts to give me a birthday W, something they failed miserably at last year.

Myself and around 30 of my closest Rammies will be commandeering a party bus and raging all day long for the 7pm game. I cannot wait for this, as we might be the drunkest collection of humans on the planet.

So tune in next weekend, or better yet, come join me in the flesh at Qualcomm and let's dooooooo thiiiisss.


Broncos: This season is over. Orton can't make key plays, bumbles around too much, our defense gets gashed by shitty teams and we made Troy Smith look like he was back at OSU tearing up Akron. Not cool.

I am officially on the Tebow bandwagon, because we might as well make this season interesting if we are going to suck donkey nuts.

Also, I am officially jumping on the Texans bandwagon (so beware, it will probably crash and burn, knowing my sports luck recently) but for the rest of the year they are my numero 1 team, for a number of reason:

-The fact that they are the 2nd largest employer of CSU graduates in the world (No. 1? John Deere. Don't beleive me? You shouldn't, I made that up because of the colors. I think No. 1 is probably CSU). Anderson, Dreessen, Briesel, Smith, Nading, Pemberton, plus Lil' Kubes all get paid NFL dollars to play/coach in the Lone Star State.

-My fantasy team consists of Arian Nation Foster, Matty Shaub, Andre Johnson and Neil Rackers. So basically, as Houston's offense goes, so goes my squad. Not the best of plans, but it is working better than Denver's plan.

-How awesome would it be to see them win a Super Bowl in Dallas' uber-stadium?

-They play almost like the old Broncos, with the zone blocking scheme and play-action passing attack. "Loves it." /gay robot voice

-I love Houston hip-hop. Gotta rep that Cham, that Bun, them Geto Boys, uhhhhh. "Chunk ya deuce UP"

Ohhhhh yeaahhhh. For the rest of the 2010-11 season I'll be jocking the Texans.

Avalanches: Chris Stewart thinks that Leonard Mason's Beast is weak. Chris Stewart isn't just beastin', he is in Beast Mode (No Marshawn Lynch). The man is 2nd in the NHL in points and goals, and if you look at him wrong, he isn't shy to throw you a whooping for thinking stupid childish thoughts.

The Avs are fun to watch, and if they can figure out what defense is, they are going to be really fun to watch.

Though I don't like Andy being injured, I do love Boods and hope he comes through for us. Never know when you'll need that No. 2 goaltender. Look at Chicago last year.

Nuggies: More fun to watch than I anticipated, but it is almost like getting some pussy from your girlfriend while you know she is thinking about this big black cock that she is anxious to jump onto. Yup, I just called Melo a whore and New York City man meat. I think it fits nicely.

Halloween (akak 
 Things I achieved while dressed as a dinosaur):

-Bit the head off of every attractive girl who walked by. Never once did this go wrong, shockingly.

-Bit the head of anyone who was annoying me, announced them dead and walked off.

-Whilst biting people with my Rex mouth, every time I still opened my mouth as if I was controlling the foam mouth. I am special.

-Tried to break-up an engagement by hooking up with the fiancée and was doing very well until cock-blocked by a German. I'll forgive you guys for the Holocaust, but this is unacceptable. See your asses in WWIII

-Post c-block, I proceeded to transfer from fun-loving Rex into Bitter Brontosaurs. My lovely sister tells me that as she was trying to say her goodbyes to give me a ride home, a person dressed as Tigger approached me. This was our exchange, while leaning over the VIP balcony:

Tigger: "Yo man, what are you? A dinosaur or a gator?"
Me: "I'm dressed as a guy who throws Tiggers off of balconies."
Sister: "Allright, time to go."

 -Thought I lost my keys when instead I made the conscious decision to leave them at a friends house so as not to lose them.

-Thought I lost my "wallet," which at this point of the night was a Ziplock with credit cards and $2, at some afterparty at 4:30am, only to find said baggy was down by my ankle, trapped by the magical elastic sweatpants cuffs.

-Spilled a girls drink at the afterparty and then told her to fuck off because if I wasn't allowed to drink at said afterparty neither was she. Who says chivalry is dead?

Welp, that concludes this week's installment of the Sack-Up. Join me later this week for SDSU pregaming analysis, post-pregaming wrap-up and wallowing in sadness without Jersey Shore /tear.