I watched about five minutes of yesterday's game. If I wanted to watch a three-hour disaster where I knew the ending I would rather watch Titanic, because at least there are boobs in that. Denver missed the playoffs when they shit the bed against Washington and Oakland. Still, my futile effort was better than the one made by the Denver defense in getting reamed by the immortal Jamal Charles.
Oh, and Kyle Orton certainly dealt with the loss of Scheffler, Royal and Marshall by getting blacked out to the point that he thought Derrick Johnson was wearing blue and orange while channeling Cutty-Buddy.
All I know is the Broncos better vastly improve on both the offensive and defensive lines next season. You win games in the trenches and we got destroyed there like the French in WWII.
I also know that I am going to miss Brandon Marshall. He is a beast, but I see no way that he comes back. Hopefully we get some compensation for him. McDaniels needs to find us a QB.
Three years in a row we have blown the home finale with a playoff spot on the line. Fuck that shit.
I guess, based on the way the year started with McD pissing off everyone and alienating Cutler, this shouldn't have been a surprise, but after a 6-0 start this is still severely disappointing. At least I'm not a fan of a team that lost 9 straight to lose the season (oh wait. Thanks to CSU my football teams have combined for two wins in their last 17 games. WOOOOOO)
Oh, and if you expected pictures you can go fuck yourself. I'm pretty happy that I was able to make it out of bed today. If you hear of a slaughter of Chargers fans in the next couple of days, you should probably wipe this blog from your internet history, lest you be culpable somehow.
Nuggs: Chauncey and Melo out and the Nuggs at least pulled off one W. Get healthy, boys.
CSU Basketball: Beat the shit out of Yale. How Do You Like Them Apples? /Matt Damon movie. What, wrong school? All those Ivy League schools can go suck a dick anyway.
Also, if you are a CSU fan you need to check out Reaching the Peak, the CSU basketball reality TV show. It is on the MTN, but actually pretty well done. Timmy Miles cracks me up every time, especially his constant speculation about Jesse Carr's pelvis. (How is that for a teaser).
CSU Football: Joel Dreessen had his best NFL game ever for the Texans. Check out this shit:
Fort Morgan's Own
Too bad guys named Chris/Kris Brown combined to cost the Texans at least four games this year.
New Years and Club Shit: New Year's Eve at the club was actually very uneventful. The day before NYE was much more eventful. It was the night of the Holiday Bowl, so all sort of Nebraska and Arizona fans and players dropped by afterward. Ndakumognganga Suh was there as well. But the real highlight was my first semi-chokehold and kneedrop on some drunk asshole who tried to run away after getting into a fight and knocking over some shit.
The clapping wasn't necessary, but thank you.
New Years consisted of a really boring night watching amatures get way too hammered, but at the end of the night my bosses rented a party bus and a suite at a badass Sheridan that overlooked the bay. So while most of you assholes were passing out after getting cleared out from the bars, I was drinking free booze. All night and until the sun rose.
Then, as the sun was rising over the lovely Pacific Ocean, I took a cab to a bar that had opened at 6AM for 3$ U-Call-Its. I had a few Bloody Marys before finally heading home to pass out at 8:30AM. That is how New Year's is done.
Avalanche: Still rolling along at a pretty good pace. 18 games until the trade deadline, the Avs need to make a little push so they can add a couple of pieces at the deadline (I'm thinking a couple of veteran wingers who play good D while also being able to chip in a few goals.
Rockies: Miguel Olivo instead of Yorvitt. Not sure that is what I would call an upgrade. Hopefully Dreamy Iannetta hits above .220.
Tweets of the Week:
gilbertarenas: i guess everyone wants me to act like the rest of the nba twitters players...(i bought a shirt today from the mall)(practice was tough 2 day
-Yep, Gilbert began tweeting this week. I wonder why? Do they not let you tweet from jail?
Seriously, I'm sure it was just a joke gone awry, as he said. The man made a dumb decision, but he shouldn't be sent to jail, ala Chedder Plax. This shit will blow over, I hope. Because the man is Nick Cannon. Hil-Lar-E-Ous.
jimgaffigan: "I gotta feeling" that I'm gonna get really sick of that Black Eyed Peas song.
-I will stab Fergie if I ever see her, but she probably won't come back to SD after pissing her pants during Street Fest a few years ago.
Go Fuck Yourself: Every week I choose someone special to fuck off. This week, it is Fox:
Dear Fox,
You need to stop broadcasting college football. You are fucking awful. Just fucking pathetic. So go fuck yourselves.
You make me so angry while watching games that I yell at my father to put it on mute. Thom Brennamen and whatever other shitcunts that you have in the booth continue to call players the wrong name and only slurp the stars, because these games, only the biggest of the year, are probably the only games that they have watched all year. Plus, I get Jimmie fucking Johnson and other dickeared manginas telling me about the game, like that asshole has watched a college football game since he left Miami in 1988.
Plus, you have way to many fan and band shots. Instead of showing interesting stuff like replays or stats. Nope, I get 5000 shots of Potato-fucking clowns from Boise wearing TOTALLY RAD facepaint. And if you must show fans, show hot girls. Find a few, and just show them. I have been TCU, I know that there are only atractive girls everywhere. How your cameras kept zooming in on purple fatties I will never know. As for Boise, errr, well, put Ian Johnson's fiance at one of the 40 yard-lines and cut to her. I understand hot girls from Idaho are hard to find.
You finally found some hot TCU girls crying at the end, when it was far too late. I don't want to see crying hot girls, that is the time that I like the beautiful shots of the crying fatties and kids.
And please, bands are not to be shown up close. Show them from the fucking blimp, spelling out cool stuff on the field. Those fucking nerds are the dregs of humanity and have no business on my TV. If I was fortunate enough to have an HDTV I would have been forced to switch to the regular feed.
GO FUCK YOURSELVES
P.S. Troy Aikman and Joe Buck are so shitty that they influenced my hatred, without ever appearing on my TV screen.
This Week: I'm terrible at following the schedule I set, but you will get two Jersey Shore updates this week. Guido's honor. One from last week and one from Thursday's show. The Nuggets/NBA discussion will be moved back a week or so at least, it will just be a midseason report, not a 1/3 season.
No comments:
Post a Comment